Thought Jam

I’m sitting here staring at the blank page trying unsuccessfully to remember that great opening line that popped into my head during the long trip back from Coney Island to Westchester. It eludes me at the moment because there is so much packed into my recent memories that I can hardly remember what I did 2 days ago. Thought Jam.

I’m a bit rusty at being able to go non-stop…it really is something that you work up to isn’t it?  Little by little we add each small thing to our proverbial plates until one day we discover that there’s no more room left. I’ve been pleasantly surprised this last week to find that 1) the amount of activity on this trip feels like a lot, and 2) I can still manage most of it with joy and enthusiasm (sore feet and high humidity not-withstanding).

I used to be able to multitask with the best of them. In fact, my M.O. was to always have too much going on. It was probably a defensive tactic to help me avoid what I was supposed to be dealing with, but I was one of those busy, productive, go, go, go types that never said no.  Until the right set of circumstances aligned in my life, and I just simply said ‘enough…I’m done.’

I walked away from everything and started over with no plans except to follow my own instincts (affectionately known as my gut). With so much emptiness, I’ve really taken my time to add anything back into my life. While it’s easier to mindlessly accept what life hands you (especially when you’re overwhelmed with busyness), it’s infinitely more difficult to let go once you’ve held it. Simplicity demands space, so I notice, I feel, I experience and I release. Living simple and as free as possible, I’m not locked in to one lifestyle so I can enjoy several.

This trip to New York has really allowed me to acknowledge just how well I’ve created a balanced life. I’m busy here. Busier than I usually am but it feels so perfect—something to embrace rather than avoid.  Who knew that if I just opened up space I could experience more without having to hang on to it? Less really is more.

Hooray for me: I’ve scaled down so much that I crave excitement rather than crave solitude and serenity. That’s a perfect switch for me. That is just one of the many things I am grateful for.