Packard, Party of One

Eating out alone can be an unusual experience, and not always a pleasant one. I’ve talked to so many that have their strategies for getting through it. But mostly it’s a strategy for getting through it, not necessarily enjoying it. What’s an introvert to do? Here’s some of the advice I’ve gathered through the years:
• Bring a book—it’ll give you something to do and look at.
• Make lunch your main meal out to avoid the “I’m the only one here eating alone” stigma from the dinner
  crowd.
• Pretend you’re waiting for someone, but order while you’re waiting.
• Sit at the counter/bar.
• Eat before the dinner rush

I’m sure there are countless more, but what strikes me the most is what depths we go to disguise or lessen the stigma of eating alone. Some of these strategies have benefits for the introvert. We love to read, and we often prefer noncrowded places; but why have we become conditioned to apologize for our circumstances…as if we don’t deserve the nice table next to the window?

I know, a lot of it is economics, but I’ve found that if I eat a bit earlier that the typical rush hour, I can ask for the nice location without feeling guilty (and the guilt is purely for economic reasons). It should be noted that I usually eat early under normal (i.e. home) circumstances, so this isn’t a concession for someone like me.

But eating and enjoying the experience are two different things. One thing that I love to do is talk to the server about his or her recommendations. I’ve tried many a dish based on server recommendations that I’ve ended up loving and would never have chosen on my own. Many times I’m up front about feeling uncomfortable eating alone and would like to make an experiment out of this…being honest more often than not yields great results.

A scenario that I recently went through went like this: “I’m eating alone tonight, and I thought I’d take this opportunity to turn it into something of an experiment and order a variety of appetizers, unless you have a better suggestion from the menu?” The response was that my server suggested their trademark Soup Du Jour and two very unique appetizers (an Oyster ‘something’ and the Calamari Rings with a Cajun dipping sauce).

The food was great, but the real benefit was the interaction I had with my server for the duration of the meal…he was most attentive (almost as if he was making sure I wasn’t lonely perhaps?), but not intrusively so. It was fun to interact and to try foods I might not have picked otherwise. Because they were his suggestions, I could ask questions about the dish—how was it prepared, where the chef is from, how often do they change their menus and specials, etc.

This particular dining experience was an adventure that turned dining solo into something fun instead of something to endure. It was a perfect evening for an introvert alone (but not lonely!). I drove back to my room with pleasant thoughts, happy memories, and a satisfied palate—a nice way to end the day before I went back into my introvert cave and recharged for t he next day’s adventure.